Haywards Heath boasts an enviable selection of drinking establishments
in the pub AND bar style. The surrounding villages cater for the
traditional drinker wanting the more right of centre atmosphere,
while the Broadway offers a fine selection of trend bars full of
the more racy type of lady.
Haywards Heath truly comes alive at
night and with more and more trend bars opening the town is rapidly
becoming the home of the night owl. So how should you start your
evening and where should you go for chic yet bohemian entertainment?
Come with us as we take you on an after dark tour of Haywards Heath's
With no nightclubs on offer the night will be one of steamy bars
and smoky pubs. That only means one place these days, the Broadway.
Before you embark on a session of any kind it's always a sensible
idea to have some food because frankly if you drink on a empty stomach
you're asking for trouble. When Sade sang 'Smooth Operator' she
didn't base her lyrics on a bloke she saw spewing 10 pints of Newcastle
Brown into the gutter so save the Kebab for later and head straight
for Zizzis. If it's good enough for Jordan and Pete, it's good enough
for you. It's also located at the top of 'The Strip'.
After a sublime meal of penne provocante-bestia, it's on to the
Star for the first drink of the evening and possibly a light smoke
with new friends. Ladies, you may want to miss the Star and leave
the men to their men talk. Try Cafe Rouge for a reasonably priced
spritzer. Maybe we'll catch up later, if you play your cards right.
The Star Umbrella
On the top of the Haywards Heath pub
Christmas tree sits The Star. Located within the one way system
it is perfect for the car enthusiast. The has undergone several
refurbishments in its time. At one stage the pub appeared to sell
poncy coffee alongside regular alcoholic beverages. The Star has
now returned to its pub roots and even has bouncers. The pub garden
in the car park features a large umbrella which we understand to
be the largest in the free world. Car parking is for staff only.
In spite of the failure of 'Down at
49's', entrepreneurs opened a London style trend bar next to the
chemist on the Broadway. Christened Orange Square and stocking a
wide selection of bottled lifestyle beverages, the bar has been
a runaway success attracting only the cream of the 18-30 age bracket;
unlike 'Down at 49's' where only the staff were over 18. Though
the same colour as the bar's sign, we don't believe the VW Polo
to be an official Orange Square promotional vehicle.
Orange Square - Trend in a bottle
Orange Square spawned 2 additional trend bars, Bar Boo! and Evolution.
Bar Boo! has a glass front so passers by can see you being a trend.
Bar Boo! is often filled to the rafters with good time girls who
like blue drinks and seem to enjoy the attentions of men in untucked
With its bare floor boards and leather seating, Evolution (recently
renamed EVO and now part of the Orange Square empire) has more of
an exclusive London feel. Many patrons sport expensive city fashion
labels like Candar, Clock House and Avanti. Evolution also shows
Sky television broadcasts and can serve premium nut selections on
request. The Broadway is rapidly becoming Haywards Heath's answer
to London's Covent Garden minus the jesters and tramps.
Located off the beaten track next to
fishing supplies centre Sporting Chance, is Penny Lane so called
because inside its orange and not green. Orange Square is also orange
inside but this is due to light reflecting of everyones tans. Penny
Lane traditionally entertains a younger clientele although a strict
over 18s and no dirty trainers policy has helped weed out the illicit
teenage drinker. They have a signed photo of Leslie Joseph on the
wall, a PA system used for live music perfomances and a ventillation
problem when everyone smokes. You may not smoke over the pool table.
With the closure of the Sussex pub,
most of the town's thugs have been herded like fighting cattle who
smoke fags into other establishments. The Heath and the Duck have
absorbed the overspill so go there if you want a lively discussion
about the topics of the day.
The Burrell, located near the station,
is very popular with commuters. It has TWO televisions, a fruit
machine, quiz machine, dart board and pool table. Cues and chalk
are provided for patrons who wish to fight. With the curry house
next door, the Burrel is the ideal place to begin the classic English
night out of beer and spicy food.
Lindfield is by far the most
popular alternative to Haywards Heath for the drinker looking for
a more traditional alcoholic experience or for youths unable to
get into Orange Square. The Witch is owned by a former professional
footballer and the bar is decorated with football jerseys from the
1970's. It also attracts the younger clientele and appears to be
the pub of choice for students of Haywards Heath Sixth Form College.
Very much in the way the Linden Tree was some years ago.
Other pubs of note in Lindfield are
the Bent Arms, and The Red Lion. The Bent Arms was once a haven
for rockers and metal-heads in the late 80's/early 90's. It now
concentrates on the food side of things and serves lager that no-one
else has ever heard of just like most other pubs in Sussex. It's
also the ideal place to take your children on a Friday night if
your idea of good parenting is forcing your child to passively smoke
for 4 hours while you slowly get pissed with your friends. The Bent
Arms has many other attractions including an antique steam driven
spit roasting machine, a giant stuffed bear and a selection of wall
mounted horse brasses. During the winter, If you're lucky, you may
get to see a nice tender piece of rump gently being spit roasted
in front of an open fire while a member of staff drizzles tenderising
juice all over the glistening oiled flesh . They also serve fish.
The only down side to drinking in Lindfield is the occasional gang
of 'rugger buggers' singing like arses. If you wish to join them
we suggest you adopt the standard uniform of comedy golf trousers,
pullover, hat and glove. You will also need to hang a bar towel
from the rear of your trousers presumably to clear up any spillage.
The Wheatsheaf - doesn't look like this now
Cuckfield has a few pubs, some of which
have been visited by celebrities. Please see our dedicated celebrity
section. Probably the most popular pub is The Wheatsheaf. Having
recently been renovated in the bland style it boasts a dining area,
2 fruit machines, a TV and a jukebox. It is also a hotel and has
been home to a number of famous people on more than one but less
than three occasions. We went there one new years eve and were treated
to complimentary wedged potato bites and chicken nuggets. There
were only 8 other people there including staff.
The Ship Inn has
a nautical theme, which seems odd seeing as Cuckfield isn't
near any waterway, coast or harbour. They used to hold pub
quizzes every Wednesday, but we don't know if they still do.
Cuckfield has seen one or two
pub closures in recent years. The King's Head was Cuckfield's
answer to The Bent Arms in Lindfield and used to hold gigs.
It also had a pool table in generous surroundings, a fair
sized garden for the summer and a jukebox. The pub has since
been converted into poncy flats.
We've never been in The Talbot
but we understand it used to be popular with pupils of Warden
Park school as an alternative to games lessons.
One thing to note about Cuckfield, if you like going to pubs
and showing off your new mobile phone then forget it. Cuckfield
is a black spot for all mobile phone signals.
Haywards Heath has at least 6 off-licences within a 2 mile radius
of the town centre and is the perfect town for those wishing to
purchase alcohol for home or park consumption. At least one off-licence
is situated near a roadside pedestrian barrier making it a convenient
place for local teenagers to lock up their bikes prior to purchasing
two cans of Stella Artois to share among thier friends.
Haywards Heath has no night clubs.
Many of the pubs mentioned have contraceptive sheath machines
in their lavatories.